Monday, November 16, 2009

If Eddie Felson from The Hustler (1961) was on Match.com

Fast_Eddie_Felson

I can't lose.

36-year old man
New York, NY
seeking women 25-35
within 10 miles of New York, NY



Relationship: Never Married
Have Kids: None
Want Kids: No Interest
Body Type: Fit
Height: 5' 10"
Smoke: Regularly. It helps me concentrate on my game.
Drink: Regularly. J.T.S Brown (Bourbon Whiskey)

In My Own Words:

My manager Charlie put me up to this. I'm not really looking for anyone but if someone with a similar life experience who understands a man with troubles comes around, I won't turn her away.

For Fun: Shooting Pool & Drinking J.T.S Brown
My Job: Shooting Pool
Favorite hot spots: Ames', Stan's and various other pool halls. Bus Station, Kentucky Derby, etc.

About Me
Best Feature: Blue Eyes
Sports and exercise: Shooting Pool & Fighting in Pool Halls
Education: Streets
Occupation: Sales Rep peddling Druggist Supplies/Shooting Pool
Income: Money comes and goes
Turn-ons: Hustling a sucker, making money, J.T.S. Brown, Blondes, Beating Minnesota Fats, etc.
Turn-offs: Losing to Minnesota Fats, Burt Young's greed, Having my thumbs broken, etc.


About My Date

Hair: Blonde, short
Eyes: Piercing yet sad
Height: 5' 0" - 5' 5"
Body type: Slender & Petite
Smoke: If she wants
Drink: Yes. I'll buy her a drink if she gets me breakfast.
Have kids: No
Want kids: No
----
This is dedicated to Carlos, whom I met on Match.com. He used "Faster Eddie Felson" as his screen name and channeled Eddie Felson on our first date.

12 comments:

  1. Great fun! I always enjoy these, & interesting that your beau's screen name was Eddie Felson!

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  2. So clever! I'd love to see this with other characters. The possibilities are boundless!

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  3. John - Carlos put his foot up on the seat and leaned on his knee just like Paul Newman did! That's why I posted that particular screenshot.

    Wendy - Well maybe you should send Eddie Felson a wink? :-)

    KC - You obviously haven't seen my one on Jeff Bailey from Out of the Past. It's my most popular post!

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  4. This is marvelous. New favorite thing to read. :)

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  5. That's so sweet on how you and Carlos met! I knew he was also into classic movies, but I didn't realise he was so cool as to pick a great screen name!

    I do love these singles ad posts. I really would like to see more of them (personally, I'd like to see one on Mark Lewis from Peeping Tom, although that might be a bit frightening!).

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  6. These are my favorite posts! too funny.
    I wish I could find a Paul-alike! Lucky gal, you.

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  7. hi there! i just found your blog and am loving it.

    this post is hilarious.
    btw, congrats on meeting carlos on match.com

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  8. Turnoffs.. having my thumbs broken etc....
    this is great stuff

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  9. This is brilliant. Nicely done!

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  10. this is a great idea. And who wouldn't want to date any of Paul Newman's charactors? Except maybe Brick from Cat on a Hot Tin Roof. Not too sure about him and Skipper.

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